Secrete Audacity

{November 5, 2006}   Should I Act…?


So I got up at nine this morning.

Which is odd, because I don’t usually sleep in on the weekends. Well, not too much. It’s not like I get up at six every morning, just the days I have to. Anyway, so I woke up but I kept my eyes closed for a long time. I was still sort of half-asleep. The air was quiet. I started thinking about what Rin had told me yesterday.

“You should act. You seem to really like it, and you do it a lot.”

I don’t act a lot, I don’t think. I like to pretend things when I’m alone or with my friends, and I role play and do some voice acting, but I’m not so sure I do it too much… But then again, I’m probably wrong.

But then again there was that time in Rin’s garage last weekend, where the creepy sounds were on and that light thing was flashing on and off, and I had my pixie costume on, and I’d act out the sounds like they were really happening to me. It was fun. And it was almost like I wasn’t even in her garage anymore, but really inside some creepy mansion or a graveyard with a monster chasing after me. Rin told me that at the times I should probably look scared I really did, but not all fakey-scared. I even screamed once or twice.

Hmm. Weird. But then there’s the whole stage-fright issue. I hate giving a speech in front of the class or any form of audience, but I’m not sure if that’s the same when I’m in character. And if you’re trying to be in character but you feel stupid, you’ll act stupid and it’ll look stupid. But if you’re in character, like really in, it doesn’t look stupid and you don’t feel stupid nessecarily. Unless, of course, your character is supposed to look stupid. 🙂

Well, I’ve got horseback riding and I have to go to the tutor twice a week. That’s four days I’ve got something to do. And if school play rehersals go every day until 3:45, then I really can’t do it. But… whatever. I’ll ask Masaki about it. He’s the stage manager of the fall play that’s going on right now; he’d know.


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